Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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