when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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