at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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