I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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