Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
