Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Randomize
