I am spending my child support on dildos
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
