North Korea, Best Korea!
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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