hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
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