so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Shame is for Republicans.
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