so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
