Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I love you. Go after that dick
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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