Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
