you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
