Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Randomize
