I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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