"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
