yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Even my vagina gasped.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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