this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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