Is it because I queefed?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
