Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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