My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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