i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
