so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
