Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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