I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
