So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize