love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
