We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think I sprained my soul last night
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
