so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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