Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
The power of my boobs compel you
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
