god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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