margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
