Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Houston, we have a blender
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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