Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
