i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
