i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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