Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
