Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
