they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize