Fuck appropriateness.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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