i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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