if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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