Someone shit on the floor
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I just googled if crying burns calories
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
