I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
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