Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
