Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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