"it" just moved
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
