I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
