so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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